Werkin' it.

Be it trying to clean the shame of that Saturday night out of upperclassmen bathroom for Dorm Crew or be it shelving books in Widener as you try desperately –for the love of God–not to see the naughty bits of those adventurous persons fulfilling the holy trinity of Harvardian activities, some of us are blessed enough to have jobs besides being a student.

And besides getting paid for mindless labor, sitting on your ass while you do your homework, or whatever perks your job may offer, we all know there are certain intangible and yet glorious qualities to being somebody’s bitch.

11:47 AM

I was supposed to be at work at 11:45. I just woke up. This is not class. The Box Office does not work on Harvard time. Oh well, might as well stop and get some breakfast if I’m going to be late anyway. 7-11 heartburn here I come. Sooo worth it.

12:04 PM

The Box Office is supposed to open at noon. My manager’s not even here yet. Figures.

1:34 PM

I cannot handle the patrons coming to purchase tickets. When I give you a map, do not tell me that you will cherish it forever. When I tell you there is a discount for children under twelve, do not ask if that applies to midgets as well. By the way, correcting yourself to say dwarf does not make it any better. When I tell you how much it is, do not stare at me blankly and pretend I was going to give you tickets for free. These are the rules via which transactions work. In general, don’t be batshit. Read the rest of this entry »

Even Fido can be racist this season!

Okay. So we all got this email:

Dear Harvard, As we approach the Halloween weekend, Native Americans at Harvard College (NAHC) would like to urge Harvard University students, staff and faculty to think critically about their costume choice. While some look forward to the annual Halloween festivities many people brace themselves for the recurring parade of Harvard students in culturally insensitive costumes whether it be the quintessential Pocahontas or Indian Squaw or the hypersexualized Geisha just to name a few.

And for those of you who didn’t have the patience to read the entire thing, we sympathize… kinda. Except we read it in its entirety out of sincere love for you and because they made us feel really, really guilty. Here is a paragraph-by-paragraph summary of its content:

• Wearing costumes that culturally appropriate is RACIST. It’s like wearing blackface, you ass. Also, your hipster Minnetonka Moccasins are tacky.
• Traditional dress ≠ costume. Traditional dress = an outfit.
• Think of the children….the Native American children.
• You can’t count your crummy costume as “honoring” Native Americans, but you can do your part on Sunday, the first day of Native American Heritage Month, by schoolin’ your racist ass.
• A paragraph on the interwoven histories of Native Americans and their contributions to the United States and Harvard University that we so love.
• “If people take the time to learn about other cultures and to get to know the Native American students at Harvard perhaps they would realize that we are not a costume. We are Harvard. And we have been since 1655.” (Sorry, that’s sort of hard to gist.)

Now, we understand the message but a picture is worth a thousand words isn’t it? Here are several long emails worth of pictures plus some controversy, after the jump! Read the rest of this entry »