Harvard students just can’t hold it all the way to the bathroom.
Last year, someone took a big ol’ poo in Quincy (and then stuffed it in a dropbox) and what WHAT what, it’s happened again, but this time in the Quad. We received this message that was sent over Pfoho’s house mailing list, and oh how we cringed.
“I stepped out of my room in Wolbach this morning and was greeted by an awful smell. Then I noticed a giant pile of shit on the stairwell between the second and third floors. I don’t know who’s responsible for the act itself and I wouldn’t care if the mess could somehow clean itself up. But it can’t. And the custodians should not have to deal with it. If you know who might have done it (whether you were with them when they did or hosted one of the watering holes they passed through on what must have been a pretty crazy night) please get in touch with that person and tell them to come over to the Wolbach stairwell and clean up their mess. Restore my faith in humanity because right now I’m pretty pissed off.”
Party fouls happen, but that’s no excuse to take a dump on the stairs. Also, once is an accident and twice a coincidence. One more doodie incident will turn this whole situation into a big shitty pattern. Let’s not let it get that far, mmm?
Well, apparently, too much fun. A certain resident of Pforzheimer House was obviously ticked off by loud noises emanating from the next door neighbors at the wee hours, presumably because those kids were “arranging furniture.” At 3 a.m. (Exaggerated wink)
Read below for the hilarious email, which was sent over the House’s open list this afternoon. Now, we at The Voice are all for “fun” activities at Harvard. But it was a Monday during midterm season, guys. Tsk tsk.
Judging by all that movement and ruckus in your room last night, I can only conclude that had a lot of fun arranging the furniture. I wish I could have joined in, but I was just too tired to get up. 3:00am is awfully late at night to worry about interior design, but to each his or her own.
It sounded like you guys struggled to move the bed, evinced by the rhythmic spurts in which you accomplished said task. If it was any earlier (say, 2:00am) I would have gladly come in and helped.
I couldn’t help but notice you kept moving your bed around for a good thirty minutes or so. Some advice: before I rearrange the furniture I generally start with a plan, that way I don’t spend a lot of time moving things. You shouldn’t move furniture on a whim, or else you’ll tire yourself out after a while. Trust me; my cousin is an interior designer. With respect to all that heavy breathing, this tip could save you a lot of trouble in the future.
Regardless of your struggles I can only imagine you had fun, judging by those ooh’s and aah’s after every couple of movements. I’m actually impressed; I’ve never quite experienced such enthusiasm and passion over dormitory decor myself. You would probably get along with my cousin. He gets really excited over interior design, too.
Pfoho has gone as far as to make a tumblr for housing day parodying other houses and have released two videos to date. One video parodies the “double rainbow” viral video on YouTube while the other plays off of “The King’s Speech.” Looks like it’s the year of knocking off Oscar nominated films for housing day videos. [insert Facebook joke here].
We wonder if “Pussy Breath” is actually going to come forward as a housing day video.
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