With the opening of the fall semester, an influx of 2015 freshmen flooded the yard in full force, edging out their begrudging predecessors into river houses and the Faraway Quad. Starry-eyed, gaping-mouthed, they wandered around the compound in a frenzy of high-pitched buzz. All ears and eyes flitted quickly from one non-descript identity to another, until they stumbled upon a particularly distinctive and memorable character.

For this series, The Voice has identified five interesting freshies that might be worthy to take note of. Let’s start with…

1. The (In)Famous Pole Dancer

Have not we all met Katalicious from our premature, over-excited Facebook correspondences? She has successfully established her Facebook persona into a sort of Harvard online “hooker” brand, shocking the more conservative peers while earning respect from even the raunchiest upperclassmen with delightful innuendos such as “High school is like a dick : long and hard. Unless you’re Asian.” Sometimes they are outright suggestive like “I cannot fucking wait for Inside Out to hit radios. That song is so orgasmic and it turns me on every time and I will grind the fuck out of any nearby person/object.” Or perhaps shorter and classier pieces like “I love your cock because it sticks up for me.”

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The video below, entitled Pussy Breath, features a few of our Harvard friends in what some are calling a “nasty” rap video. It’s got nothing on Nelly’s Tip Drill, though quite a bit less sex-positive than H-Bomb.

Well there you have it. We’re almost speechless. While deep down we want to like this, we want to laugh, we want to get it. But… we also can’t help but fight the general nausea produced by watching this. Looks like we’re all going to avoid plain yogurt in the dining hall for a while.

Mad props to our hip New York Harvard gals for making it to video vixen status before graduation. See, this way it’s ironic. Ten years from now, maybe not.

A good hipster is easy to find

Overwhelmed by all the shows in Boston this month? Noice kindly narrows it down for you. Click on the date to buy tickets, and click on the artist to find its last.fm page.

10/8 – Grizzly Bear, Beach House – Orpheum
There’s no better way to chill after turning in your first Gov 20 paper than with the gorgeous, elaborately arranged pop of Grizzly Bear and Beach House.
WHAT TO EXPECT: A classy affair/hipsterfest.

10/10 – The Psychedelic Furs, Islands – House of Blues
Perennial post-punk favorites The Psychedelic Furs and melodic-pop genre-benders Islands make a strange, but potentially great combination.
WHAT TO EXPECT: Electric sitars?! And hipsters.

10/13 – Kelly Clarkson – Agganis Arena
Dear Kelly, Our Lives Would Suck Without You. Love, Noice.
WHAT TO EXPECT: A loooot of unclaimed $280 VIP packages. Ironic hipsters.

10/15 – MIKA – Orpheum
“The Boy Who Knew Too Much” brings his bright, playful pop to Boston as he tours for his freshly-released sophomore album.
WHAT TO EXPECT: Gaydar gone haywire!

10/16 – Art Brut – The Middle East
Punk-tinged indie rockers Art Brut tour behind their Pixies-produced third album, Art Brut vs. Satan.
WHAT TO EXPECT: The jury never coming back on Pretentious or Not?

10/22 – STS9 (Sound Tribe Sector 9) – House of Blues
Dump out all the records from WHRB, smash ‘em up, and stir to get STS9, the writhing electronica-dance-jazz-rock-hip-hop jam band.
WHAT TO EXPECT: The distinct odor of “rotting Bonnaroo wristband.” (No hipsters!)

10/27 - Metalocalypse: Dethklok and Mastodon – House of Blues
Need we say more?
WHAT TO EXPECT: …

(Picture courtesy of http://blackscientist.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/hipster.jpg)

Noice's alternative to soggy PB&Js at FlyBy.

Let’s face it–that line at Flyby down in freezing-cold Loker is never going to get shorter before 1pm, so it’s time to find new digs to refuel after Mankiw’s lecture on… whatever. (Not like anyone was listening.) Next time, venture into Café Gato Rojo, almost hidden between Grays and Matthews and nestled in a nook underneath Dudley House, for a quick cappuccino and for a nice respite from the lunchtime fury.

With a conscientious menu of fair-trade coffees, Gato Rojo also offers muffins, scones, and other baked goods made fresh daily. For those not inclined toward caffeine (to which we say “WTF”), a generous selection of bottled juices, loose teas, and other beverages are also available. Not only do they take Crimson Cash, but a small coffee only costs around a buck. Read more about the hipster invasion at Dudley’s premiere lunch spot after the jump.

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