A doodle of a bad pun? How positively analog of us.

Hung up on the name? Well, what’s in a name? An iPad by any other name would still scrub Flash content as sweet. And most VES concentrators would agree… that bezel is fugly. But anyone who’s been in a large lecture hall knows that this school is chock full o’ Apple whores (er, SteveJobstitutes?).  So we know some of you will at least think about buying it. Is it honestly worth it? And amidst our iphones/ipods/ and MacBook( Pro)s, what could this possibly add to the already complex student experience? The reasons are sometimes subtler than you might think but here’s how this blogger sees it:

Rah-rah ah-ah-ah!

Well it’s Affordable? Kind of.

Yeah. So it’s not exactly friendly to those of us here on need-based scholarships. But at $499 you could waive part of your university health insurance, and even have enough left over to get those f*cking adapters (USB, really?). Just hope you never need a UHS prescription. [Note: avoid sweaty finals clubs where fist-pumping shirtless man-boys could fling body sweat into your face and give you conjunctivitis. Is that paranoid? Not if you can’t afford the copay.] Read the rest of this entry »

Noice shout out to the Zuckster for letting his alma mater slip into his network’s highest-rated comedy for the past two seasons. Tonight’s episode of 30 Rock not only gave Keith Powell some well-deserved lines but also included a truly gratuitous Cambridge reference. But we don’t want to commend Tina Fey’s oeuvre for merely dropping the H-bomb. Instead, we want to revel in the fact that the writers got the usually collar-popping, sometimes random, and always hilarious loftiness of Ivy pompousness dead on. During the episode, Liz (Fey) mentions that the show is going to Boston, Toofer (Powell), wearing a red Veritas tie and a tennis sweater, pipes up about his academic roots in the ‘burbs, only to be pwned by Jenna (Jane Krakowski)… sort of.

Toofer: “You know, I went to school in Boston. Well, not in Boston, but nearby. No, not Tufts–”
Jenna: “Oh, shut up. It’s 14 degrees there.”
Toofer: “… Harvard.”

Yeah, it's really that cold here.

Conan just peaced, Toofs. The pressure’s all on you.

Miss you, Coco!

Amy Odell of NY Mag writes this headline: “Prada’s New Menswear Collection Contains Disturbing Harvard References.” Harvard? Disturbing? Prada? All in the same sentence? We were obliged to continue reading.

“We’re disturbed. Not by the tight cropped sweaters, for we’ve always been a proponent of men showing their figures and wearing less clothing…. But since when is Harvard a fashion point of reference? … Even if Harvard kids would never wear this stuff (or most things remotely more interesting than boat shoes with no socks), the problem is, the world doesn’t need them to think themselves any more important or WONDERFUL than they already think they are.”

Dear Amy, thank you for lazily subscribing to two of the oldest Harvard cliches ever: that Harvard student’s can’t dress well and that Harvard students are completely self-absorbed. A quick look through Noicethreads can prove the first wrong, and an actual encounter or conversation with any Harvard student will prove the second wrong.

But wait! It doesn’t end there. See Amy’s other fantastically incorrect vision of Harvard students in her article about Harvard Yard, the fashion line launched by Harvard:

“…Harvard Yard — a lawn we imagine makes a nice resting ground for Harvard students to repair glasses, wipe down their pocket protectors, and memorize an extra few digits of pi — inspired the spring collection.”

Yeah, that’s real original.

I am not a WASP. But a quick dig through my wardrobe would reveal to you that I’m a closeted WASP fan. Beneath the mounds of hipstery leggings and frocks I own lurk the few, the proud, and the WASPy. In my second drawer are telltale seersucker and madras prints. The third drawer contains a horrific amount of Ralph Lauren sweaters in every color of the rainbow. Tossed carelessly by the foot of my desk you will find a pair of Topsiders (never worn with socks, naturally). Although I have yet to own a Lily Pulitzer dress or lobster embroidered headband (er, I’m not rushing to anytime soon), I’m secretly an avid proponent of prep style.

For girls though, prep style must be treated with the greatest delicacy. Like many things in life, it’s tempting to overindulge. Simple sweaters and skirts, monogrammed jewelry, a well-tailored tweed jacket are all acceptable staples. But if a girl walked into lecture wearing madras shorts, pearls, headband, and some pasteled variation of a shirt, I would smack her in the face with a tennis (or squash?) racket and then proceed to ralph. As in, barf, not Lauren. Read the rest of this entry »

by Ingrid Pierre ‘12
December 2009 Issue

Dear Undergrads,

If you thought four days of Thanksgiving break were hard, try this newly extended break on for size. J-Term? More like “J-Terminate me, now”! Some of you may wonder, what’s so bad about several weeks of continuous break with family-members-who-love-you-dearly-and-haven’t-seen-you-in-months-and-want-to-catch-up-really-badly-but-not-before-you-show-them-how-to-work-skype-so-you-can-call-grandma-and-then-fix-the-TV-that’s-been-broken-since-you-left-because-no-one-else-knows-how-to-do-it? (Yeah…) Perhaps that’s assuming a great deal about your home life. But that’s just the thing; you do have a home life and a Harvard life. And if you’re an ordinary person, you should know that there’s a clear distinction between the two.

So for those of you who may not know what you’re in for this break, we’ve come up with a little advice on how to ease back into Kansas, Dorothy.

Social Etiquette:

• If someone asks you about school, just smile and say it’s all good. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT mention how horrible CS50 was or bring up any readings and assignments in conversation. No one cares. We mean it. Also, tone down the big words and use of obscure eponymous adjectives. While you may fling around a “panegyric”, “heteronormative”, or “Aeschylean” on the daily here, everyone else will think you’re a tool.
• Don’t wear your COOP approved Harvard gear in public. Keep a low profile, and don’t rub it in people’s faces that you go here, besides any schmoe can get a Harvard shirt. I mean your cousins probably wear theirs all the time (for the ladies, of course). Read the rest of this entry »

Yeah.

At 1100 hours today, a poor Phoenix S.K. pledge was spotted on Mt. Auburn in full Royal Guard garb, red coat, black furry hat, serious face, and all. Though this small act of hilarity inspired giggles among passersby, here at Noice, we’re mostly just disappointed he didn’t break out in dance.

See our final club shenanigans from last week.

"Aca-pantsless": How wooing should be done.

And it begins. Male final clubs haven’t been shy in the least about their initiation shenanigans this week. Initiated members could be found in public places doing very embarrassing things. Noice is on the lookout for you to capture and edify this week’s tomfoolery.

Shenanigan #1: Today, a little before the scandalous class Lit & Sex, Phoenix S.K.  gentlemen, posed as the “Aca-pantsless”, charmed (or blasphemed?) Sanders Theater with a special rendition of “Mr. Sandman.” Some claim Professor Kaiser sported an amused smirk throughout the performance.

Shenanigan #2: Gentlemen of the Fox shamelessly rock out in front of Memorial Church with Rock Band. Again, bow ties.

Fox band. Cute.

Read the rest of this entry »

Or not.

Produced by a group called Back of the Class. And yeah. We don’t really know much about this “LA-based group of comedy writer/director/performers”, but since DerrickComedy isn’t making videos about us we’ll settle for this. Also: the dudes are all Tufts grads. Hmmm.

Recently there has been much hubbub on the sightings of major stars filming in the Square. These soon to be films will be joining in a long line of films set at our famous institution. In case your ego doesn’t feel bloated enough, here is a list of some of the most well known movies that use Harvard as a plot subject and some fun facts about them!

Legally Blonde (2001) – Everyone’s favorite Harvard-centered movie (or just mine). We are all well versed in the story of Elle Woods and her unlikely acceptance to Harvard Law School through which she plans to win back her ex, Waner Huntington III.

Fun Fact 1: Reese Witherspoon spent two weeks spending time with and studying actual sorority girls for the project. She also attended law school for a day. Now that’s what I call dedication to a role.

Fun Fact 2: The final graduation scene was shot in the Great Hall of Dulwich College in London because it was not included in the original script. When it was added to the movie, Witherspoon was already filming “The Importance of Being Earnest” in England.

Fun Fact 3: Witherspoon got to keep every piece of clothing from the movie, as per her contract. That’s a whole lot of pink.

Read the rest of this entry »

Hi there. This is The Voice Ninja. Who am I? Why have you never seen or heard of me? It’s because I’m a ninja, duh.

Occasionally I’ll come out of the shadows when The Voice hires me for a little espionage. While it’s of questionable morality, sure, I like to think of it as community service. No but really, my feudal Lord (aka TF) caught me plagiarizing in lit-sex and they made me agree to either do this or take a gap year.

So here I am, hiding out in a tree, watching a final club’s induction…or what looks like the beginnings of one. Which final club you ask? Well…it’s the tacky one that looks like a Cantabrigian Hooters: The Owl. And this isn’t the first time they’ve let their owlets outta the bag.

What follows after the jump are the notes I took from the event. Some highlights: random dude with axe, typical bro behavior, and somebody playing Joan of Arc in the leaves.

Read the rest of this entry »

Woodstock 1969 or Yardfest 2010?

Noice is excited. We’re so excited that were building blanket forts and playing with Super Soakers. That’s right, we’re turning into children. Why?

Because the CEB (College Events Board) just announced that they are looking to see who we want for this year’s Yardfest… about 6 months away. But were already freaking out, like majorly freaking out… because unlike last year’s distressingly vague “fill-in-the-blank” style poll they’ve actually given us a couple options. And the options are… A MILLION TIMES BETTER THAN WE COULD HAVE IMAGINED. Especially given the Ratatat/Sara Bareilles combination of last year. No offense to those artists, but yeah, this is looking goooood. And since Girl Talk was epic fail we’ve had high hopes that the CEB would make up for that hot mess. Let’s not have Yardfest be another Yawnfest.

Here’s a link to the poll. This blogger’s faves from their list: Andrew Bird (impossible to get his tickets fast enough), Drake (crushworthy), Grizzly Bear, TVOTR, and Of Montreal. But don’t take our word for it, get together with some friends and vote for the ones you want to see! Read the full list of CEB suggestions after the jump!

Read the rest of this entry »