Hi all! You may know me as a prolific commenter on HarvardFML; this is my new and improved means of doling out relationship advice! Got a question you want to ask, or a situation you want thoughts and advice on? Email me at somedude.harvardfml@gmail.com, and watch this space for my answer! Today, a Valentine’s Day Special, featuring advice for the single and advice for the taken!

The Oatmeal's Valentine's Day Comic - click above to read the whole thing.

I don’t know what to get my boyfriend/girlfriend for Valentine’s Day. Help!

It’s perfectly okay to stick to the classics – if you’re shopping for a girl, flowers, chocolates, or jewelry are all highly acceptable. Just about anything from Lush works. And remember: you live so close to Burdick, it would be a crime to buy her Godiva. Don’t be afraid to be a little spicy, either (for instance: I’m getting my girlfriend a Snuggie and a copy of the book The Snuggie Sutra). Just a Hallmark card is a cop-out; but just a nice handwritten card is lovely. A nice dinner out works perfectly for both sexes (if you go to Upstairs on the Square on Valentine’s Day you might see me there), but reserve ASAP since it’s a popular night to eat out. Gifts for guys are trickier, because guys typically don’t get into Valentine’s Day as much; when in doubt, just a card is fine. Something token but masculine would work well: for instance, if he’s a snappy dresser and has shirts with French cuffs, get him a pair of cufflinks. Guys often like practical gifts, but a pantygram is cute, too.

Keep in mind that the point isn’t to lavish, the point is only to say “I’m thinking of you,” so don’t go overboard. Be careful about expectations — this isn’t a birthday or Christmas, so the giving of gifts isn’t necessarily a foregone conclusion. A lot of people don’t think of Valentine’s Day as a gift-giving occasion. Don’t let that discourage you from giving a gift, but don’t expect one will be given to you. In giving, also beware of setting an expensive precedent that you’re not going to be comfortable sustaining. If your relationship is less than a year old, particularly, keep it simple.

I don’t have a valentine this year. Help!

I usually hear this from women and not men — not because there are necessarily more single women than single men on Valentine’s Day, but because women are much more likely to find it worrying. Single guys looking for love: I can’t tell you what a big opportunity this is — there are women fretting about this holiday whom you could make very happy!

Single ladies: if you’re fretting, you’re probably making too big a deal out of this. There is no shame in not having a date on Valentine’s Day. Go out with a bunch of your friends and have a great night. Guys won’t just fall from the sky into your lap, so don’t build your plans around that happening spontaneously. Because of the high expectations surrounding this holiday, it’s rare for guys to want to start relationships immediately prior to Valentine’s Day, but there are great things you can do to set yourself up for success every day of the year. I’ve written about how to meet new people and how to plan a first date; give those posts a read if you haven’t yet, as well as those three posts about attraction.

Hope you all have a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Special thanks to everyone comping the Voice; all the cool kids are doing it. Email Some Dude at somedude.harvardfml@gmail.com.