by Kathleen French ’13
December 2009 Issue

Through a very long and strenuous interviewing process, I was able to discern exactly how Harvardians spend their week of studying. Of course you have your library addicts (c.f. “Diary of a Lamonster”) but now they’ve been amplified to levels of sleep deprivation previously unheard of. Some people simply stay awake, and then just keep trying to stay awake…to see how long they can survive. I found a few willing intellectual soldiers to share with the world how studying is done here…or not done. Alex Chivescu ’13, when not “crap[ping] out a series of words and sentences that [he] can hopefully rearrange into a compelling (or at least intelligible) argument,” engages in other activities:

“Since I have more time to do it over Reading Period than any other time in my life, I also enjoy going to the gym. Not because it helps me study, or because it’s healthy, but rather because I like working out in front of a mirror and making funny faces in exertion. I also blast music while I shower, since going to parties these days makes me feel unaccomplished, guilty, and a little bit colonized. I think my roommates are a bit annoyed but at least they know when the bathroom’s occupied. I eat for hours in Annenberg putting on weight in anticipation of my month-long J-term hibernatory period. That way, when I get home I can turn the heat up, close the blinds, and sleep for the rest of winter.”

He even went as far to temporarily deactivate his Facebook (!SHUN!) His reasoning? “to keep myself from unnecessary socialization, further pursuit of rejection, or the whole ‘keeping in touch with friends back home’ deal. It’s really just that one random kid who was never friends with you popping up in your chat box with the classic “OMGgGgGgG how’s HARVARD?!” and honestly, I just can’t deal.”

I must note, though, that as much as I am in favor of working out PROCEED WITH CAUTION. There’s a deadline for injury here (I know LOLWUT?), and FYI it passed in November. So even with an ex post facto injury, like, I don’t know—a broken finger that prohibits writing, don’t expect any extra time. So, work that treadmill…just don’t fall/trip/etc., or you’ll be investing in a lot of ibuprofen and channeling Chuck Norris during your multiple exams that require three hours of writing.

It was one individual, though, who took the cake in providing ultimate personal maxims on Reading Period. In the answer to defeat all answers, Kelly Jo Popkin ’11 writes,

“Rather than reading during reading period, I question my sexuality and establish important life goals. I study a lot during reading period by visiting alt blogs and cultivating a personality that goes against the grain. I start by studying for all the other exams. If I have time, I will study for my own. I don’t really read during reading period. Or when I’m on my period. Especially if I’m on my period during reading period, which keeps happening to me. I develop and memorize important strategies to outline how to study.”

So there you have it little ones. Go forth and read blogs. Like Noice. Studying is fine too, but if you watch House then you know that if you stay awake for a consecutive eight days…well, you die. Get some sleep y’all, don’t break anything or you’re screwed, and bonne chance.

Photo credit: chemilo